Throwing "Easy" and "Comfortable" Out the Window : 5 Questions We Asked Before Making A BIG Decision
Decisions are impossible to avoid. Immediately upon opening your eyes in the morning, they begin.
Simple decisions like how many times to hit the snooze button (if you still have that luxury...kids don't have a snooze button...I checked), what to wear and eat for breakfast, and as the day goes on, more come; respond to that text, answer that call, take advantage of that awesome online deal (I need this, right??)...they just keep coming.
Then there are the decisions that should be easy, but aren't, because you're indecisive, and you just want someone else to make the decision for you (that's me).
And sometimes, out of no where, a big decision presents itself and you not only have to make that decision, but you also have to decide what to dwell on in the midst of it.
The weight on our hearts can be great, and the pressure can be high on our family, but if we decide to respond and rest in the truth of the Bible, & ask the right questions...
"WHO can give us wise counsel?
WHAT could God could do in our lives if we follow?
WHEN is it the "right time"?
WHERE is God leading?
WHY is He asking us to do this?"
...we will come out on the other side with a story that can be glorifying to the Lord.
The following is our story...and it's still in the making...
I remember it like it was yesterday...
My husband and I were sitting comfortably in our living room each night, each holding a sweet little newborn baby in our arms with our "big boys" snuggled up beside us.
The Christmas tree was still up, all the new toys had found new homes around the house, and our hearts were still...life was comfortable, predicable, easy (well, as "easy" as it could be with newborn twins and two toddlers).
At the end of our long days, we just exhaled a breath of joy.
Looking back at that time in our life, my heart yearns for one more day of this.
I'd give anything for that "easy" feeling.
You see, not too far into the new year, my husband approached me with a crazy idea.
An idea that would throw words like "easy" and "comfortable" right out the window.
Just a little background on me, I grew up in Jacksonville, FL.
Most of my family lives there.
We'd see each other at church, meet up at the park, and occasionally just bump into each other out and about.
Sundays we were usually gathered around my parents kitchen island eating something off the grill and swimming in the pool until bedtime.
This was what I had grown used to, gotten comfortable with. It felt good.
My husband, on the other hand, had gotten pretty comfortable with change.
He grew up a few hours south in Melbourne, FL, where his family still lives.
He went to college and started his career in Orlando, FL, then felt the Lord leading him to Jacksonville for a job opportunity...where we no sooner met at church and began dating.
After we got married, traveling a short distance to visit family was easy, and as our nieces and nephews were to the family, we were always able to be there for all the big, fun, family events and holidays.
This big idea was about to change all of this.
It was about to force us to depend on the Lord for where He was truly leading our little family of 6, even if that meant it was leading us away from the rest of our family and everything we ( I ) had ever known.
So...the big idea.
As you've probably already concluded, it was a job opportunity.
A recruiter from a big agency had contacted my husband, made an offer that seemed too good to be true... a big step up the corporate ladder, an awesome addition to his resume, and quite the salary increase for our new family of 6!
And the cherry on top...it was in a city we could easily picture ourselves living.
This move would be easy...predictable...and quite "comfortable."
"Sure, let's see what happens", we told ourselves.
Then, several days later. My husband came home from work with this question, "What do you think about Boone?"
I responded with, "For vacation?"
He said, "No, to live." WHAT?
He informed me that a position had just been posted for a ministry up in Boone, NC...Samaritan's Purse, specifically Operation Christmas Child...and the job description seemed to be written just for him.
This didn't come out of the blue either. I knew the Lord had placed a desire on his heart, years prior, to be a part of something BIG.
A ministry salary?
A complete unknown?
We began to ASK ourselves these 5 questions
It was SO HARD to ask our parents to pray about a decision that could possibly take 4 of their grandkids far, far away from them, but we are incredibly grateful that each of our family members share our faith in Jesus, and willingly joined us in prayer. What a blessing that was to our hearts, even though it was still incredibly painful.
Many people in our church had been in our shoes before, having to make a big decision regarding careers and moving away from family, and were able to give us wonderful advice. One friend suggested to "Keep walking through both doors until one or both of them closes. Then you'll know where the Lord is really leading you."
I am so grateful we had people to confide in.
Finding a few friends and family members to walk alongside you during this time of questioning will allow the Lord to speak to you through others...ultimately helping give you some clarity and direction.
I admit...I made a list...you know, the pro's and con's list we all default to when we think it's really our decision to make?
The one where all our fears, insecurities, and selfishness spills out onto paper?
My pro's list for the first job grew as I thought about that comfortable life that it could offer us, and my cons list for the second grew as I thought about everything I would have to give up.
My husband, however, was able to look past the obvious written out on paper.
He searched his heart and knew the Lord was opening these two doors, in this order for a reason.
We knew we had to make a decision, but we also knew the Lord had already made His.
God is at work. He just wants us to TRUST in HIM. He just desires to lead His children on a path for their good and for His glory!
Is NOW really the "right time"?
We had always talked about moving north one day; Somewhere we could experience the seasons...not just summer, more summer, and a little less summer, which is all we got in Florida.
So, really, this didn't come out of nowhere...it just came a littler earlier than I was anticipating.
I mean, we had newborn twins and all the help and support we could get right at our fingertips!
Who would be crazy enough to move NOW?!?
I will never forget the Lord's still, small, but powerful voice that came to me as I sat in our room, nursing our sweet babies in the dark one night (or early morning...it's all a blur).
I was crying out to Him in my heart, and crying physical tears which landed in a puddle on my nursing baby's pj's, at the thought of leaving my home, at the thought of having to make this BIG decision when everything in me wanted things to stay the same.
I remember begging the Lord to close both doors, to just make this decision DISAPPEAR.
And in that moment, from the depths of my heart, I heard the Lord say,
"Trust ME. Follow him."
That simple truth was spoken with such gentleness to my panicking heart. And it was everything I held onto from this point on.
You may never see it as the right time. You may have a dozen reasons WHY it's not the right time. But to God, His time is the right time! We are just called to put one foot in front of the other, and walk in faith.
I wanted the BIG PICTURE.
I wanted to see all the answers to our worries clearly laid out before us...before making our decision!
Where would we go to church? Where would our kids go to school? Where would we live?
I wanted PEACE. I wanted CONTROL. I wanted to know it would all be OKAY.
BUT...that small voice continued to remind me to FOLLOW HIM.
On our wedding day, I vowed to submit myself to my husband, who vowed to submit himself to the authority of the Lord.
And here I was, being called to trust the Lord and follow my husband where he was leading our family...it was, as I had to remember, my husbands heart that was being lead to make a career move like this, and it was my job, as the Lord reminded me, to follow him.
Maybe the Lord is moving more rapidly in the heart of your spouse. Maybe He is making it more clear for your spouse to see the outcome of your decision. Revisit your vows, and remind yourself why God placed you in the role He did. And pray that your hearts would become ONE in this decision in the end!
Tickets were purchased and trips were planned. Up first...Boone, NC.
On the plane, I KNEW, deep down in my heart, that we weren't really deciding between two jobs any longer.
By this time, it was becoming clear.
I had this feeling that we were about to be "swept off our feet" by a ministry that I knew my husband wasn't going to be able to say "no" to.
I KNEW that we were going to end up in Boone, even before the interview took place.
Boone was beautiful. Even in March, when trees were still bare and the chill was still in the air, it was just as I had remembered it.
I had visited Boone as a child, one of our Fall family trips. I had been here, playing in the leaves, running down the hills, walking over frozen ponds, and making memories that would shape my heart with a love for the mountains.
God's plan was at work from the beginning.
The campus was breathtaking. The people were genuine, on fire for this ministry, and truly interested in us as a family...not just in my husband for the job.
At the end of the day....I could tell.
My husband was all in.
Sometimes, you already know the answer before you even have to make the decision. Sometimes, the Lord gently changes your heart while you're sleeping. Sometimes, He moves in your heart when you're least expecting it. Sometimes, the decision isn't as hard to make as you thought it would be.
The next day, as we drove around the city, looking, praying, soaking up all that Boone was, we ended up at the top of a hill where 3 huge three crosses sat...3 crosses you could see it from all over, and from the top of that hill, we could see for MILES in every direction.
As we took in the view, my husband wrapped his arms around me, looked me in the eyes, and without speaking any words, we just knew.
We agreed right then and there to go on this BIG adventure together.
God provided the answers to ALL OF OUR QUESTIONS and provided them ALL IN HIS TIMING.
He took care of the BIG and the SMALL things that plagued my mind and heart in the midst of the decision.
And wouldn't you know it...THIS is the view we see from the top of our street...The same three crosses where we said "Yes" to the Lord!
What a gracious Heavenly Father He is.
We could have ended up living anywhere in the city, but He chose for this to be our view.
His gentle reminder.
His gift to us.
His way of confirming that HE is in control of our BIG DECISIONS.
These 3 crosses are representations of what I learned about my God as we stepped in faith...
Welcome to Dwelling Well Mom! I'm so glad you are here! I'm Christi, wife, mom of boys, Christ follower, picture taker, DIYer, chocolate eater, and coffee drinker. Born and raised a Florida girl, now braving the mountains of Boone, NC, I'm on a journey to find peace in the midst of my mundane. Join me!